We live in a culture where finding fault with other people is seen and experienced as the main way of dealing with problems. Offered in a supportive way criticism can be very useful, but it’s usually delivered and received as an attack. In the critic’s mind, it’s always the other who’s wrong, so that the critic never has to look inwardly at themselves.
As a result, many people are afraid to reach out and truly help others on their own terms. We need to find a way back to communicating effectively.
How many people have arguments where, after it’s over, neither person has any greater understanding of the other? The argument has yielded nothing, because each person was listening only to his or her own point of view.
Family arguments start by one complaining about another. Complaining is a form of criticism, whereas commending the good and showing gratitude have the power to bring out the best in everyone.This is cultivating the listening in your child, and at any time of life this is the road to success.
But while you’re waiting for the change to occur in him, if that’s what needs to happen, you can cultivate your own listening, so that you can speak in a way which he can hear.
Speak to the listening of your child.